The Dance
“Of course you can. Why would I get mad at you for asking that? Level Four and Five students ask me that all the time.”
“Really?” Mo would never dream of asking an indoctrinator such a personal question. She inwardly snorted. What was she doing right now? Though this indoctrinator was her mama first, an indoctrinator second. Maybe that’s why it felt so personal.
“I’ll tell you what I tell them,” Mama said. “The Chosen Council doesn’t find your only match, it finds your best match. So yes, you can fall in love with someone who isn’t your Chosen.” She wagged a warning finger. “But it should only happen before you’re Joined. Never after. Anyone who falls in love with someone who isn’t their Chosen after they’re Joined is weak in the Way. And we know what happens to those weak in the Way.”
“I know. I just wondered if it’s possible at all.”
“Most Rymellans date before their notifications, just like you’re doing. So don’t worry about it. Enjoy your time with Lesley. You’re a long way from twenty-five,” Mama said, brushing a stray hair off her face.
The Chosen ring on Mama’s third finger caught the light. The names Anderson and Middleton were engraved on it. Mo hoped the names Middleton and Thompson would be engraved on hers. It wasn’t outside the realm of possibility. “Mama, I know I keep saying Les isn’t my Chosen, but she could be, couldn’t she?”
Mama’s face darkened. “No. You don’t want to start down that path, young lady. You have to trust the Chosen Council.”
“I do.”
“But you feel so strongly for Lesley, she must be your Chosen. That’s what you’re thinking, isn’t it?”
Mo didn’t answer.
“That’s a mistake. Remember, the Chosen Council considers all the same-oriented girls around your age when it chooses your mate. It has the entire planet to choose from, not just those who live in our sector. And the girl it chooses won’t only be the best girl for you, but for everyone, because you’ll be sure to have children strong in the Way.”
“I know, Mama.” But there was still a minuscule chance it could be Les. She’d try not to hope it was Les, but it could be Les.
“When the Chosen Council summons you, you have to accept your Chosen.” Mama playfully nudged Mo’s arm. “And that’s a lot easier when you don’t have someone else in mind.”
“I might be a Solitary.” After all, two of her three older siblings were.
“That’s true, and it won’t be long before we find out if you are. But you’re young, Mo. If it turns out you have a Chosen, you won’t be summoned for at least seven years. So don’t worry about your feelings for Lesley right now. A lot can happen in seven years. Beep her tomorrow, okay?”
Mo nodded. She dreaded talking to Les. Not only would she feel like a complete idiot, she wasn’t sure Les cared anymore. But she’d beep her. She’d apologize, at least. And if she had to watch Les and Patty making lovey-dovey eyes at each other at the academy, that would be her punishment for listening to an airhead like Patty in the first place.
Mama leaned over and hugged Mo, then stood. “I saved your pudding for you. Why don’t you come downstairs?”
“I’ll come down in few minutes.” Mo rolled onto her back. “Thanks for saving it.”
Mama smiled. She left, closing the door behind her.
Mo turned onto her side again and sighed. She hadn’t planned to fall in love with Les. During her Level Three at the Indoctrination Academy, when the indoctrinators had first started teaching the Chosen Tradition, she’d vowed not to fall in love with anyone but her Chosen, since there didn’t seem much point. But then she’d gone ahead and fallen for Les during their Level Four. Stupid, stupid, stupid! And why Les? They’d grown up together, knew everything about each other. You’d think they would have been sick of each other. Why couldn’t they have stayed friends? Then she wouldn’t care about Patty, and she wouldn’t care whether Les turned out to be her Chosen.
If she had a Chosen.
In ten months, she’d find out if the Chosen Council had found a match. Les would find out in five. Mo swallowed. If it turned out Les was a Solitary but she wasn’t, or vice versa, they’d know for sure they were doomed. She snorted. They were already doomed—she’d seen to that. She was lying here worrying that Les wouldn’t be her Chosen, and Les was probably hoping with everything she had that she wasn’t!
Someone knocked on the door and opened it. Mama again. “You have a visitor.”
“Who?”
“Lesley.”
“She’s here?” Mo sprang off the bed, her heart pounding. “Do I look okay?”
Mama studied her. “Go give your face a little wash,” she said quietly, placing her hand on Mo’s back and steering her into the hallway. “Then come down.”
In the bathroom, Mo splashed water on her face and looked in the mirror. Who was she kidding? No amount of water would make her presentable. She looked like she’d just awakened with a bad head cold. Returning to her bedroom, she grabbed her comb from the dresser and raked it through her hair. Why was Les here? Had she stopped by on her way to the dance to gloat? Was Patty with her? Mo’s hand stopped in mid-stroke. No, Mama would have mentioned that, prepared her. She tossed the comb back onto the dresser, braced herself, and headed downstairs. Maybe Les had decided not to go to the dance. Maybe she was here to talk.
Her heart fell when she reached the bottom of the stairs and caught a glimpse of Les sitting in the living room. Les was dressed for the dance, in the navy blue outfit that set off her blond hair and matched the blue eyes Mo loved staring into. And here she was—Mo looked down at herself—in an old shirt, the pants she’d worn when she painted her bike last week, threadbare socks, and her breath whistling through one stuffed-up nostril. Patty, watch out!
She hesitated outside the living room, wanting a few more seconds of believing their relationship still existed before Les opened her mouth and crushed the illusion. Then she forced herself forward.